Ketchup Bisque

I’m going to kick this off by saying that ketchup soup tastes NOTHING like tomato soup, and trying it made my face do all sorts of awful cartoon-like things. The vinegar in ketchup makes for a truly foul soup experience. As someone who has eaten things for money her entire life, I beg you to trust my definition of foul. Fortunately, a packet of sugar will neutralize the vinegar taste without turning the soup sweet.

Originally, I did this with a 75 cent can of tomato soup. It tasted amazing, so it had to be tried with ketchup since I realize that some readers won’t be able to swing the can. There is a pretty big difference in taste, but at least its better than plain ketchup soup… which honestly made me want to gouge my eyes out and take a scalding shower.

Tomato Bisque

1 can tomato soup

6 plain creamers

6 butter packets

  • Empty the soup into a small pot and heat at medium setting.
  • Gently stir in creamer and butter.

In contrast to it’s ketchupy counterpart, this bisque is rich and delicious. It’s perfect with grilled cheese sandwiches.

And now for the beast that consumed my morning…

Ketchup Bisque (alright, its not quite a bisque… but it’s the closes you’re going to get with ketchup)

1 cup water

6 ketchup packets (3 tablespoons)

2 sugar packets (2 teaspoons)

15+ butter packets (1/4+ cup)

6 plain creamers

1.5  tablespoon flour

  • Combine ingredients in a small pot and heat at a medium setting
  • Sift flour into soup
  • Stir rapidly with a fork or wisk to break up ketchup bits and any clumped flour
  • Simmer until the soup thickens

Makes a single serving.

If it weren’t for the flour, this would be a thin oily mess… not unlike some of the men I’ve dated* (awwww snap!).  I’d also like to emphasize the “+” on the butter. Actually, just put a “+” in front of everything but the ketchup. The objective here is to thicken the quasi-edible ketchup-water concoction and make it smooth and creamy like a true bisque should be. Notice I said “like”… this recipe is never going to be as tasty as the can version, but it’s nice to have options. In a nutshell, make that 75 cent can happen.

*I’m looking at you, Johnny B.

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